As I stand and gaze at the water's surface from riverbank, it is impossible to see what lies beneath. I want to know so badly. My view obstructed by brown rapids. My curiosity driving me, telling me this is a "need to know" situation. Uncertainty, or maybe simple fear, holds me back from just jumping in head first to find out. What obstacles are waiting to challenge me?
If I leave this ledge
On the water's edge,
Will I be able to swim?
I love the symbolism of this image. Whether speaking metaphorically of "the water's edge" or literally, the meaning remains the same. Staring into the bluest of blue tropical oases there is uncertainty and unknowing. Even in the clearest of clear, who can ever be certain of anything?
It's quite daring and bold to proclaim certainty. What's that cliche again? Something about "life is what happens while we are making plans?"
The water will give back to me what I give to it. The water reflects and keeps moving, whether I stand aside it or within. It is how I face not just the water's edge, but also the water. Be it with courage, fear, excitement or playfulness, that:
I learn about myself and how to truly Feel free to be.
Comfortability with my own self,
Forgoing any care to uncertainty.
I seek the ability to accept and understand. I want to accept and understand you without judgement, just as I want to learn how to accept me without judgement.
A Peaceful freedom.
Comfort in uncertainty.
Improvisation.
From the water's edge I can see my surface reflection. It is a reflection of who I am as I stand at the precipice, before I decide to dive in.
To dive in is to find a new angle of reflection. Is not the surface of the water its own separate edge?
I have experienced the full currents before which I once stood. Now there is no doubt. I realize my capabilities, my strengths and weaknesses.
Is the water's edge only a challenge? Is it only a place to ponder?
Giving my brain a break and raising my head above the surface edge of the rapids, I realize:
I use the water's edge to rest and refresh, cool down and rejuvenate, play and recreate.
Standing in the water, from this side of the edge, I can see the reflection of who I have become. Tired, changed, stronger.
A place that began as nagging uncertainty transforms into a haven for rest...
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